After a long reflection I still have no idea what I am. People often ask me ' are you religious?' when I can give no explanation because I don't like to use the word ' Dragon with people, a name that is known and a name that doesn't need an explanation. I feel alot for the Scandinavian/Celtic faith but that is not precisely for one hundred percent. The Oriental faith also is equivalence but also it's not entirely correct. I would like to have a name, a group to which I may belong because in the end, the word ' dragonkin' also isn't quite my thing. The Dragon is my companion, my follower and myself, Humans are my antithesis, my uncertain ally and myself and that is a bit bizarre to follow.
I see an animal as equivalent to a human, I eat much meat but I would eat the flesh of a man if needed. I am grateful to humans, in addition, they have saved my life in my first year of the Dragon (1988- 1989) but there are too many, they are annoying and vortices me my freedom to live, survive and die in a dignified way. Or another way to explain, humanity is my father, the Dragon is my spiritual mother and partner. What makes this faith so weird is that there is no morality attached on this, in fact I am free to do what I want to the most extreme things because good and evil does not exist for my Lord but there is for my father who has saved my life as a human being with heavy penalties and morals If I don't listen to them. My Lord is not there in flech so my father (humans) has the power over me, in other words, chains around my wrist and legs. This lets me languishing in a corner but accept to do what they want. A kind of ' wait until the death follows in hell, where the death just will bring me as a part of nature just like the dragon. My mouth can't speak about the Dragon only my fingers that can write about it. I fall stil if I wanted to explain this to others because my Dragon actually don't want such a communication, but I'm still a man, and that clashes with each other so darn often. My mother and partner agree with each other that others are not important to someone like me, just live for yourself. I don't like to say this in public but I still show an incredible hatred towards beings (not only people) because I'm not always sure if this second chance is something that I wish to have. life with so many hidden hatred is not fun, it's exhausting and painful and no dead dragon or living human will save me from that.
I'm looking for a name for this unusual belief but unfortunately the dictionary isn't large enough to give names to something like this. I think that this is seen more as a psychological belief but that is certainly not the case I'm sure. I have seen and felt too much evidence to ignore this longer.