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Reality Wipeout

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Dacorian

Search for a name

After a long reflection I still have no idea what I am. People often ask me ' are you religious?' when I can give no explanation because I don't like to use the word ' Dragon with people, a name that is known and a name that doesn't need an explanation. I feel alot for the Scandinavian/Celtic faith but that is not precisely for one hundred percent. The Oriental faith also is equivalence but also it's not entirely correct. I would like to have a name, a group to which I may belong because in the end, the word ' dragonkin' also isn't quite my thing. The Dragon is my companion, my follower and myself, Humans are my antithesis, my uncertain ally and myself and that is a bit bizarre to follow.

I see an animal as equivalent to a human, I eat much meat but I would eat the flesh of a man if needed. I am grateful to humans, in addition, they have saved my life in my first year of the Dragon (1988- 1989) but there are too many, they are annoying and vortices me my freedom to live, survive and die in a dignified way. Or another way to explain, humanity is my father, the Dragon is my spiritual mother and partner. What makes this faith so weird is that there is no morality attached on this, in fact I am free to do what I want to the most extreme things because good and evil does not exist for my Lord but there is for my father who has saved my life as a human being with heavy penalties and morals If I don't listen to them. My Lord is not there in flech so my father (humans) has the power over me, in other words, chains around my wrist and legs. This lets me languishing in a corner but accept to do what they want. A kind of ' wait until the death follows in hell, where the death just will bring me as a part of nature just like the dragon. My mouth can't speak about the Dragon only my fingers that can write about it. I fall stil if I wanted to explain this to others because my Dragon actually don't want such a communication, but I'm still a man, and that clashes with each other so darn often. My mother and partner agree with each other that others are not important to someone like me, just live for yourself. I don't like to say this in public but I still show an incredible hatred towards beings (not only people) because I'm not always sure if this second chance is something that I wish to have. life with so many hidden hatred is not fun, it's exhausting and painful and no dead dragon or living human will save me from that.

 

I'm looking for a name for this unusual belief but unfortunately the dictionary isn't large enough to give names to something like this. I think that this is seen more as a psychological belief but that is certainly not the case I'm sure. I have seen and felt too much evidence to ignore this longer.

 

Dacorian.

Dacorian

No more Questions

It has now been several months since I got separated from other people that affect my faith. It has done me some good, I feel strong and psychologically correct. I can lay quietly in my bed without people in my head who think they know things better. When I go into the forest and be secluded of all human silhouettes, only than I'm close to my faith. I came to a conclusion that people all over the world cling to the timeline that exists, and the current time is very inappropriate for me to persevere. In fact, it would always be very inappropriate because although the past was less stressful, it is now a life of appropriate measures and a trapped feeling. Imprisoned but free life goes on into a realm that I can't understand. Should I be thinking about this? Am I worthy enough to know what happened outside this realm?

 

I might go too far with questioning these insoluble questions. Maybe it's just the intention to live without thinking like most people do. I finally die with these questions, unresolved. My dream is that all people and animals to stop reproducing so that the earth goes into decline with the existing response what the four elements have caused so many years ago. No children, no more religions because nature is now misfits, a negative effect on life on earth. I see elements of nature as the most powerful on earth, after which all the elements come together and created life. In fact, I must worship the lifeless but in the end to my existence, I have never asked for a second time. The first time was hard and had enough of it. Dying was like sleeping and before I know it I was conceived again, against my will and before I could sleep again, before I finally got rid of this body I must face death again, something extremely frightening and not a nice prospect during life. I would like to ask 'why?' but this is not a god, this is not a human supernatural power, it's nature itself, powerfull lifeless objects.

 

I'm attracted to the earth element, I really don't care for the other elements. I also discovered that I'm also attracted to Hallow's eve, a belief that this element was seen as a dragon from another realm. I don't know if this brought me back, because it knew that I still remember and deserve a second chance after so many darn years and he knew that I really am bound to earth element? Can I believe in another realm, just as the Celts did? Why my pure body was replaced with something that I never wanted to have and negatively changed my mind? Hating them is no longer an issue with me, watch them how they act makes me laugh and their ideals seem so ludicrous. I get more and more at peace with this idea, waiting until this time I will get the rest I deserve and having back my original bones that no one can find.

 

I never needed anyone, I just need my own mind and remain standing in this unlikely tale of reincarnation by natural effects.

Dacorian

I often ask myself whether I was losing my mind or dragged into the human desire for beauty. It's what you could call a 'new age religion' that's been haunted me for years. At first I refused the feelings I had for this creature and I ignored them because it is not possible in this society, and not because it seems childish. I did not believe in the spiritual or God or Satan and I still don't. I believe that we are made out of the four elements, lifeless made life and that the dragon is the first evolved being with wisdom with his fish- like appearance. only slightly less perfect than they are represented. four limbs, no fire or other weird things, but perfect to live in this life. So much that I can feel them.

call me crazy, that's why keep this for myself. I think its such a natural force left that is unique with living beings. Higher beings are not human, it's so stupid to think that the last evolved creature like us should deserve a human like god. It is hard to wear in this society because it also affects relationships with people. This I can not bind to human beings like it should. The creatures made of flesh and blood fighting to stay alive and still die deserve more respect than gods.

 

 

For 6 years i've been trying to find a group for this matter. People who worship dragons like they are a higher power. This is a difficult situation for someone who individually choose this belief because dragons remain a myth, for stories, games or movies. For many, dragons are just a toy and an escape from everyday life but not for dragon worshipers like myself. For me, the dragon has so much more. Call it a spirit guide, unbound to whatever. If I could pray for him I would do that, but alas. I don't know people like myself in this case but it would be so great if I could do this with others who understand. This is a religion and I am sure there are so many people with this same idea, but afraid to say this to anyone. The only religions who are accepted in social life are based on the superiority of humanity like christians or muslims. This belief has no name, it will only be seen as a lavish fantasy for people who love to roll play. But bowing to a beautiful picture of a dragon, no dragons figurines to collect and talk to the one statue. That is what Christians do but in this case not against a man or something that likes people in his surroundings. Approach as inferior, that's what counts.

Dacorian

You can't change how you were born or how the people have made you to the person you are today. But hatred is the only thing I can really accept after everything. I feel that this test, in conflict with wisdom is the struggle that I currently get. I regret that many people don't understand me in this because it would help many people in their faith, I am sure. If I could say my sentences that I have in mind, I'm sure that every stupid dragon loving human would prohibit me not to response again. These are the black pieces in my life, the things that gnaw at my mind when I see people react to their draconity, it kills me inside. Therefore is that I dress myself in black, every day, to make me remember what I feel and what I am, The black dragon in a wrong body. Then people can see how black I am in my mind, but never been able to express. The dragon means more to me than what the world is, and I would like to explain that to the world. How can I reassure them by saying what I have in mind? Impossible i'd say. How can I have confidence in humankind, after all what I see, know, for what they don't get, for what I don't get of them?

 

I sound very imaginative and caught in an epic story, but make no mistake in this message. I tried to clarifying the other site how dirty my reality is, even with dragons with questions that are very difficult to answer and the members of any foolish site about dragons may not react differently. The dragon has wisdom, in that they are right, but they never dare using it ... if they have any wisdom anyway for wisdom will wake up with hatred, I have been living with it for years and it still grows. My love for the one dragon came before I even knew what a dragon was, more than 20 years back. After thinking for so long you can't hardly accept that people are giving a very narrow-minded response to this issue. This beliefs are new, like a new age faith, I discovered it a few years ago. First I was glad I was not alone with these thoughts, until I saw how they react, like it was a game, like some children where playing a game with each other, Sharing Fantasies and things like that. I continued to visit sites in hope to know people who use the word 'dragon' less, but i never really found them. A man, as I am is happy with some companionship, that is a mammal for ya. For that reason, I began to learn English. Because that is the international language where you can reach them most. But as a dragon I say no to you all and die without me knowing it like everything else with your strange happy dragon family.

 

But all this does not mean that I should change my mind, hatred in my body and it makes me strong. This is not the hate where you can step over dead bodies, not in this life anyway, but a feeling where you can think about a lot, and so gain your wisdom.

Dacorian

Some time without people who think what should not be is doing me good. No know-alls in the rather extremist belief of mine (I admit) so I know now that only myself is the one who shall live and die with it. I am particularly angry with those who see life as a game or something like that. People have made me as I am today, they've taken me from my sanity to continue to exist as a thing. I hate them, and every day it comes out more and more for what they've done to me. Life is a gruesome spectacle.

 

The lifeless makes life by accident, why should we admit to our lifeless masters to continue this life. Therefore god is merciless, it does not know anything, it's just a powerfull thing who not get appreciated for what they've done, creating life. Well I am too just a thing that is natural and unimportant in the existence of others. I'm talking about the natural elements, the four kings of life. The laws of our existence is the fault of those elements, not the people, because actually there are no laws. Sad how people and animals linked to the natural good and bad and evolution.

 

According to legends, the dragon is a master at influencing the elements, or at least one of them. I want that too, but even though I am apart from nature, I always have to look at the ugly human faces and their annoying habits until i die, I will never be free, nobody will. but whoever doesn't make this question will not suffer like I do, they just live and die. That must be like 98%.

Dacorian

break through

After so many years I finally found myself and what to do in life with the dragon on my side. I'm going away, temporarily and say goodbye to everyone. I had no chance to notify everyone so i'll just tell it here. I'm not sure if I will return but I need a lot of time to think about myself. I've always had a hatred against people and that is just increased the very last months. I do not think anyone wants to understand my thoughts So it is better to have a long break.

 

I wish you the best in this life and hopefully I see you in a few months.

Be the Dragon, Be Blessed!

Dacorian.

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