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Everything Dragon

Spirit Balanceholder

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About Spirit Balanceholder

  • Rank
    The Silver Dragon
  • Birthday 05/25/93

Contact Methods

  • MSN
    martinkleinpaste@hotmail.com
  • Website URL
    http://
  • ICQ
    0

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    The Netherlands, Trapped within (Or being) the most paradoxical thing in existance; a human mind.
  • Interests
    dragons, spirituality, gaming, chatting, chaos >:3, movies, programing, playing guitar, psychology, philosophy, unraveling myself.
  1. The Supernatural

    For as long as I can remember being kin, I've been actively interested and seeking senses of supernatural experiences, and... there have been moments, but nothing that could not be explained. I do consider it a shame, being left without an answer, but that I suppose is just one of the many answers I will not receive this life, and that I'll just have to live with it. I think of myself as an atheist, and a skeptic, because I've always had a hard time with fully believing in anything for that matter, this due to a lot of philosophical rambling I'll save you for now. Anyway, all that I have ever felt towards dragons, and my supposed spirit guides have been unlike anything I have ever felt before, nothing can compare to it. I am however uncertain if this is due to it being supposedly real, or me simply so intensely wanting it to be. Because of this also, this post will be quite extensive, as I cannot give an easy answer to this. As for my past as kin, I've had times when I supposedly controlled the wind, where one of my exes would stand witness, though, just like me, she was not in the most... 'sane' state of mind. I've had times when I felt I could control the weather, even if only slightly, to cut me a path through rainclouds so to say. Aside from this me and both my exes shared in these... experiences, living multiple lives at once so to say; a human one, and a super-natural one. This all made me think of myself as more than just human, as more than just such a despicable cruel being. I wanted it to be true, and every situation where I should feel something I did... Again, I still don't know if it was me wanting it to be true, rather than it actually being so. Ghosts I would have experienced, in my own home, and even without me telling my exes, whilst being over, they would be able to sense them too... coincidence? Most damning of all to my faith in this all, was the fact that I could never sense their 'beings' being present, never could I sense beyond my human form... except for 1 time maybe. Aside from my experiences locally, with people I actually knew IRL, I've also had experiences with Talon (Lightbringer), as some of you might remember. He was one that inspired me greatly, one that truly made me feel important... He probably was the being that was closest to what I was. He however, had a lot more experience, backstory, something you could write a book about, making it seem all the more real to me. When we still had a lot of contact, I was still very... novice in this all, and he wanted to see what I'd actually be. He told me that he could gauge me a bit, if I were to focus my energy, and do as he instructed. When I did (I assure you, it was nothing more strange or wrong than you've already read), he replied to me, that the amount of energy would supposedly be impossible to be contained within a human form. This sounded logical to me, as excitement over occurrences like these (things that felt supernatural) would often have me filled with adrenaline, and my muscles twitching in excitement. The idea that this would be because of the amount of energy or 'power' that I had, seemed logical. A few days later though, he told me about his brother, Bloodbane (look him up, there are supposedly accurate images if you google him), about how he betrayed talon, and how he was now a malevolent force in 'the spirit world'. A few days after, he told me Bloodbane was on the move, and supposedly was turning to me... I swear, that day I would have sworn I smelled something putrid for the duration of my IM convo with talon. I was able to visualize the situation, as I always would, as it was the only way for me to have any insight (into THE spirit world? or MY spirit world?), I would have repelled Bloodbane, to the amazement of talon. I felt strong... So I want(ed) to believe. As time passed, and I became more experienced, I would feel the energy of a dragon surrounding me, and by then, I would have realized that all my spirit guides (I had multiple) were actually only 1 true guide. All part of the same dragon, all part of the same force... I still use his name today... and... admittedly… even converse with him from time to time. It however would take me another year or 2, before I would realize the truth about his being: He and I are the same, in a very literal sense. He was, and still is like a mirror image of myself, a draconic form of my mind, a way to be honest to myself as well… no matter the situation. You could call him in a sense, My Conscious. This is one of the few reasons why through all my skepticism, he still remains, without any objections. You can punch a mirror, but a reflection never changed, unless you change with it. And of course I have changed a lot through those 7 years, but never has my love for dragons changed, nor has the sense of personal affinity. See, I don’t know if this all qualifies as just a human delusion, a common misconception, a simple dream… Or if it qualifies as super natural powers, an old powerful soul, a godlike alter-ego. Especially when saying it like that, I feel that It’s the former… Regardless of this all, I am still just a human being living my life on earth, and if any or all of this qualifies as truly supernatural, will probably change little about my life at this point. I will never stop dreaming, and I’ll try to never shut my eyes when awake… But sometimes… it simply is hard to tell a vivid dream of ecstasy, from a simply mental image. Martin/Orn Navnik Darastrix/Spirit Balanceholder, all of me.
  2. Passed first semester, time for some R&R and celebrating my birthday sometime soon.

  3. My psychedelic experience (mature, long entry)

    haha, well, been off of em for the last 14 months or so. But trouble because of this insident has haunted me for a long time, endagering passing my first semester within a year. I've finally recovered now, and as I already posted, I passed my first semester; things are looking up for me. And I've godda say, you've missed out... then again, from the things I used to hear from you at times, I would deem it unnesesary in your situation.
  4. A little experiment

    Passed my first semester, thank god for that. 30/30 points :3. Getting a lot of help I considered unnesesary, but I think they'll help me in the long run to be able to be more consistent in my performance. Oh oh oh, belgium, thats only a (relatively) short drive away from here. :3
  5. DragonTube

    Found this, not sure how, but I did.
  6. A little experiment

    Well, I have dyslexia, and it's something that has haunted me always. Now around high school I learned it all as best I could and passed those exams. At my former (medium level so to say) college, I had no reason to pay it any mind. At this college (higher level) I suddenly was faced with a test, wherein I needed to find all the errors made. Being dyslectic it’s by its very nature one of the hardest task you could give me, and I failed it already 4 times. Starting with an E (3), going to a D (5), now I finally got it with a C (6). Now I'm finally in a position to finish my first semester, which needed to be finished within a year, or else I'd be expelled.
  7. Impossible accomplished, brain died, dutch exam passed

  8. A little experiment

    Ok people, we have officially arrived at an alternate dimension: I have passed my dutch exam... which is impossible.
  9. A little experiment

    Thanks, made it myself :3
  10. Returning after a long absence

    yaay val :D, seems I poked in at a good time.
  11. A little experiment

    *yawns* hi guys, everyone doing fine?, awesome comic(s) btw. Also, who stole my avatar?! Can't find it, so put this one up. If you look on my profile, it has ANIMATIONS :D
  12. I'm a Dragon Kin and I'm a Dragon Furry Introductions

    Welcome to ED. Can never have to many brothers. Shame that you come at a time when I'm mostly inactive, but if there's anything kin related you can always (try to) talk to me.
  13. A little experiment

    did homework, bein' a bit lonely, watchin' some random series, playing some guitar. the usual I guess. wish i had a lover again though.
  14. A little experiment

    easy day tomorrow: from 8:45 till 10:20, nearly a day off, though that means i do have to go to bed now already *le sigh* XP
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